When Family and Friends are Fickle…..

yes it is cruise time again!….
 Today’s topic:  ” How do you respond to Family and Friends that don’t support your decision to homeschool?”

This is a topic that touches the lives of just about every homeschooling family.  I think I can safely say that every person who has ever even brought up the subject of homeschooling to their family and friends has faced some dissension with their decision. 

I am blessed that in my extended family, there is support.  There are still questions, that are asked, that are not asked of family members who choose public education….. and I patiently answer those questions.  I find that the “proof is in the pudding”, when it comes to defending your position to homeschool.  I have many people say how impressed they are with our children, how polite, how well mannered they are.  Many times we receive comments about how they are able to converse respectfully with adults on a variety of subjects, “they are so pleasant to be around” we often hear.  Those are the comments I store in my memory banks, not as a yea me!, but as outside conformation that we made the right choice.

Here is how we as a family have chosen to react to those who don’t agree with our choice to homeschool:

In most cases we ignore it.

Yup, you read that right…. we ignore it.  We are not able to control what anyone else thinks or does.  We can only control the thoughts and actions we produce.  We chose to let love cover it, and ignore the comment.  Most comments are made from lack of understanding, or from fear.  If the person chooses to ask questions and seems to want more information, we will gladly, and kindly answer them.  If not, we ignore it.  Their words will not change our convictions….. so we just let it go.

I know, I can hear you now….  ” But Julie!  You just don’t know what I have to listen to!….  They are telling me my kids will be stupid, they say I am wrong!  They say my kids will be sheltered and unable to function normally….  that I am abusing them by not letting them go to school….”  
Regardless of the words……. we need to respond as Christ would.  Did he offer many words in his defense, before they took him to the cross?
If a person is more persistent, and aggressive in their attitudes, the same rule applies.  As a Christian, my behavior needs to be in line with what would be glorifying to God.  That is what I will be held accountable for.  I am told how to react :
“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.”  Ephesians 4:29

I can not react in anger, and tell them off and let them know just how wrong THEY are….. no, the Bible says my words are to be full of grace….. and telling them off, would not be very edifying.

This passage goes on to say that I am to be tenderhearted, forgiving…. because Christ forgave me. It is hard to stand ready to forgive someone who has hurt you with words, but it is what we are called to do as followers of Christ.

Above all, we should pray for those that may not agree with our decision to homeschool.  Don’t pray that God will change them and their point of view to agree with yours, but that God will help you to love them, and be quick to forgive their hurtful words.

Don’t forget to click on the big Cruise Ship to see what other homeschoolers have to say on this subject!
Thanks for stopping by!

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2 thoughts on “When Family and Friends are Fickle…..

  1. I agree with "ignore it." That's so hard. My flesh wants to name the ways and the why's (I know that's not a word…lol) but your right, it's best just to ignore the comments. And as I've found out, when you argue until you're blue in the face, it does nothing except put a foot in the door of anger. They won't change your mind and you won't change their's either.

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