Wednesday Wisdom

So……
as I was trying to dig out the avalanche of clothing from the little boys room….  I came across a pair of Hunter’s pants that Jeremiah the gum maven left his mark on.  There was this big black blob stuck to the knee of one of the new hole free pants.

I walked to the kitchen and tried ice….  didn’t work so good.

Then I was trying to just pick at it…  and I got to thinking how I wished this was silly putty because I could use Rubbing Alcohol and it would just dissolve….

And then I thought, well what do I have to lose by just trying the alcohol… so I used a q-tip and put some on…  it didn’t dissolve.  I was getting a little depressed.  I soaked it again….. and headed back to the bathroom to pick at it some more….  it lifted RIGHT OFF!…  it released the sticky from the denim…

Yippie…  pants saved from doom!

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Wednesday Wisdom

Alrighty…  here are some things that I learned that made me feel real dumb, after I knew them.  I walked around for a long time not knowing some of them…. and it was embarrassing to be the one people were laughing at…..

I hope these things help you so you will not “know” something in the future.

1.  Pink Floyd is NOT someones name.  It is a band name. I knew it was a band, but I thought it was named after a single person.  Not so.

2. I had heard the name Cruella Deville for years in the Disney Movie.  I was 34 when I realized it was spelled de Vil….. and even then the fact that it was DEVIL was not plain to me.  It is now.

3.  A few years ago, we got a new microwave.  I thought it was saying “food 15 ready”, every time it beeped to say the food was done. It made absolutely no sense to me, but hey, maybe it did to the folks that made the  microwave….. A few months ago…. it dawned on me, the 15 was digital for IS… it was saying “food is ready”….

4.  The Beach Boys song is NOT Bop~a~Ran…… “Ba~Ba~Ba~……  Ba~ Bop~aRaahn….” … no… it is Barbra Ann…… yeah… I felt dumb.  Real dumb….  I will not tell you how long I sang it wrong.

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Wednesday Wisdom

I made that….  that thing right up there.
I have never done a thing like it before.
I will probably never be able to do it again.
Really.  I can’t even find the program I did it in on the computer anymore.
All these buttons, and banners… and watermarks and hickey-do’s,
well frankly, they make me itch, they give me the hives……
I don’t understand how to do it.  I try to import a picture… and then write on it.
 the picture starts changing colors and won’t stop.
I would probably be better with an instruction manual.
One that would tell me exactly what to press to fix whatever it is I know I am going to break.
That is my wisdom for the day…. if you are afraid you are going to break it….
get a tutor…. go to a class.
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Wednesday Wisdom

It is Wednesday, and I am supposed to be full of Wisdom again.

Today I will share with you bits of wisdom that I have learned the hard way.  I have done something…and I usually have had some sort of embarrassing moment because of it….. whereby gaining the wisdom, to never do it again.  Some of the things on the list, have happened to people that I have known, and I have graciously learned from their experience…..hopefully you will learn from mine.

1.  When on your first date.  Never order the Rice Pilaf, with your meal.  In mid-sentence, a piece that was tucked back in your cheek, a piece so small you didn’t even know it was still in your mouth, will fly out of your mouth and land on someones plate.

2. ( This one isn’t mine.  I was there.  I saw it happen.  I learned.)  Never lean forward on a ski lift, in the attempt to see what is directly under you.  You will fall out…. and on a ski lift…. out is DOWN!

3.  Do not turn your head to see something that caught your eye, while you are on a winding canyon road.  You will likely lose control of your vehicle…. and slam it into a hill.

4. Wear clean underwear.  They really do cut clothes off of you after you have been in a car accident.

5.  ( I learned this one after having kids )  If a child has stuck something up its nose.  You can save yourself a panic attack, and a trip to the emergency room, if you gently close the unaffected nostril with your finger…. and blow into the child’s mouth ( as if doing CPR ) the air you blow in, will be forced out the open nostril…. and usually blow out the raisin, m&m, or Lego….  sometimes repeated breaths are necessary.  If that doesn’t work…. keeping a good set of forecepts around the house, might be something to think about.

6.  While making suction noises,( they sound like big zerberts you do on baby’s bellies ) with your back while you are in the bathtub…. is fun.  You can get stuck.  Real Stuck.  So stuck that you have to have the kids go get dad…. so he can figure out how to UN-stick you….  so save yourself the embarrassment, and just don’t do it.

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Wednesday Wisdom

I am sitting here staring at the screen.  Wondering what to write about today…. and the words Wednesday Wisdom come to mind….  Then I think…. wisdom?  what kind of wisdom?

I still don’t really know, but I will start with some of the things I do know, and that people have told me they have never heard of before…..  If you learn something great….  If you think I am nuts…..

I am.  I already know it.

Today you get money saving tips:

1. Wrap your block of cheese in a paper towel before putting it back in a plastic bag in the fridge.  This will keep the mold from forming for quite sometime… the towel absorbs the condensation in the bag, and keeps the cheese from getting slimy.

2. This also works for the leftover grated cheese when you have tacos.  Wrap the grated cheese in a paper towel, and the next day when you pull it out, it wont be slimy.

3. Wrap your heads of lettuce in paper towels and put them back in the produce bag.  it keeps the lettuce drier, and you can keep a head for twice as long in the crisper drawer.

That is it for now…. the buzzer on the dryer went off.  I have clothes to fold…..

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